I often have conversations with people about how society has lost it’s courtesy and civility. It often leads to discussions of entitlement and how our youth today, don’t seem to have the understanding of manners and decorum that once used to be taught in school and practiced at home. Then, you sit by the young gentleman in a small plane who gets up and assists you to your seat and starts polite conversation and you realize that all is not lost in the world of polite society. When instructed to turn off all electronics, he did so promptly and stowed it in his carry-on. He indicated he was a university student travelling to visit some friends for a weekend party. If he had of told me that first, I would have judged him as one of those youth that I often talk about with my adult cohorts. I was impressed with his ability to manage conversation, make eye contact and use the most impeccable manners throughout the flight. I didn’t point out the impression he made on me 
for fear of embarrassing him but I want to pass it on – especially to young people out there – manners and courtesy are never out of style. Make courtesy a habit. You never know who you are going to impress with it.
Tag: good manners
Cart Full of Courtesy
Inspired by a conversation I heard on my favourite radio morning show this week, I thought I’d write about the unwritten rules of Grocery Store Etiquette. It stemmed from a trivia contest about self-check-outs at many grocery and department stores these days. It then morphed into a chat about pet peeves, not only at the self-check-outs but shopping experiences in general. Have you ever been frustrated by your visits to the supermarket because of what you felt was “rude” behaviour of other shoppers? I certainly have and I know my husband has since he groans every time he needs to go. These are some rules I try to keep in mind when shopping:
1. Observe express lanes as “express” – These are the lanes for people who only have a few items and want to get in and get out fast – hence the “express” in the title. I figure if I can hold all my items in my arms than I’m probably safe to use this lane and this is typically less than 8 items. In one experience, I was behind a gentleman who had a shopping cart heaped with groceries and he put on 8 items, paid for them, then put on the next 8 items, paid for them and so on. I would have went to another lane but it was a day before a long holiday weekend and the other lanes were packed also. The store clerk had to finally tell him that “1-8 items” meant that he was only supposed to have a maximum of 8 items only. Being the polite person she was, she continued to check out his purchases but warned that he shouldn’t do that again (much to my aggravation).
2. Place the divider bar on the belt when finished placing all items – Although I don’t get too upset if someone doesn’t follow this rule, I do appreciate it when it is practiced. It says that the person ahead is considering me and making a small gesture to let me know that I am welcome to place my items alongside theirs at the check-out. Small but not insignificant.
3. Pull cart to the side when checking items on the shelf – Aisles often have only enough room for two passing carts in order to get optimum use of the floor space to display items for sale. It is not considerate to leave your cart in the middle of the aisle while you compare labels or make decisions on which item to purchase. Make sure your cart is off to the side so others may pass. Of course, you also want to be sure not to leave your cart parked too long to the side if there are others waiting to pick out items that are blocked by your cart.
4. Put the cart in the cart-corral when finished – There are usually designated areas in the parking lots or stores, conveniently located, to gather carts when shoppers are finished. It isn’t just for courtesy’s sake, to return your cart to one of these areas, it is also for safety’s sake. A parking lot cluttered with stray carts is hazardous. When returning my cart, I also like to take the extra effort and interlock it with the carts previously placed. It will allow space for more carts and it will make the cart retriever’s job a little lighter.
5. Have your cash, debit or credit card ready – While waiting for the cashier to scan your items, get your payment ready. This will allow you to complete your transaction promptly, saving time for you and the others waiting behind you.
Are there other rules that you like to follow when shopping?
After You Ma’am.
Volunteering at a recent event, I was amongst 4 retired gentleman. Each of them was probably around the age of 60. The event lasted a few days so I had the pleasure of these gentleman’s company for the duration of that time. We checked in at Volunteer Headquarters every morning and then caught a shuttle bus to our designated work areas. I couldn’t help but notice the overabundant politeness that seemed to take place. Each of them insisted I enter the shuttle first, they stood if I stood, they would open and hold the door for me and wait until I went through first. On one occasion, I got on the shuttle after everyone else and the bus was full. At least two of the them quickly stood up and offered their seats. I indicated that I was okay but they were insistent that I take one of their seats. I didn’t want to create a scene or not respect their expressions of courtesy so I took the seat.
I wouldn’t say this behaviour was foreign to me but it certainly wasn’t something I was used to on a regular basis. I know from my university days, when feminism was at its peak, men offering to do anything for women created somewhat of a controversy. Perhaps that is part of the reason it isn’t as prevalent so much any more. For me though, I liked it. Men or not, being met with courtesy, grace and respect – it was a good thing.
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